BT Payment Processing Fee: Bandits!

I have just to-day woken up to two things. The first is that BT really are BANDITS who are only interested in making massive amounts of money and they do not care how they accomplish that. The second is that BT is a company with no scruples and even less style.

What has gotten me so riled up is not :

• BT’s EXTREMELY poor broadband provision;
• BT’s massive and unreasonable broadband charges;
• BT’s silly and impenetrable call charge structure;
• BT’s daft six page basic bill that attempts to hide the real costs behind a smokescreen of drivel;

No… all these things are really frustrating and make the blood boil but what I am really, truly and deeply angry about is:

1. BT’s Payment Processing Charge;
2. BT’s customer Service ethos.

Now the first thing makes me so angry because I always pay my bill on time and by cheque. I really begrudge these robbers taking £4.50 extra from my pocket just because I don’t want them having access to my bank account through a direct debit system. Let’s face it this shower of thieves is so incompetent I doubt if my bank details would be safe in their hands!

Why should I have to PAY these tubes extra for the delightful task of paying their already over-inflated bill? This is a disgrace. It is nothing short of robbery.

If you agree… then please feel free to add your supportive comment here. And while you are at it you might want to sign a wee e-petition to the Prime Minister telling him to move his lardy and lazy frame and look into this issue quickly. You can find that petition here:

BT Penalties Petition - http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/BTpenalties/

Do it now…eh?

Of course the second thing that makes my blood boil is BT’s Customer Service ethos - for want of a more fitting word! When I recently rang to ask about this charge and to express my strong objection to it the little people in the Belfast call centre displayed that they really are little - little in mind, bereft of understanding and lacking in even the rudiments of customer care. Well… the managers anyway. The poor guy who took my call sympathised but said he could do nothing. I hadn’t expected him to do anything and I got exactly what I’d expected!

The BT Belfast supervisor lass’s response to my request to lodge a complaint was to say that she would add a note to my account. As helpful as sun tan lotion in the Arctic! Requests to speak with someone who could take a complaint seriously were met with incredulous stonewalling and eventually a duty manager. Her duty turned out to be to keep telling me I was wrong and wasn’t listening to her speaking. I thought the job was for them to listen to us but apparently not!

Eventually this jumped up little jobs-worth very helpful individual decided to just cut me off. A brilliant ploy in the battle for customers. I know everyone in BT’s phone book will be really glad to hear that they way they deal with complaints is just to put down the phone. It’s easy when you are hiding behind a large company where everyone has the same luxury as the royal family - only known by christian first names!

The Customer Services Manager I eventually tracked down on my second call, and after my elongated navigation of BT’s silly answer phone system, proved to be JUST AS HELPFUL as the duty manager. When I asked to speak with one of their Complaint Review Managers (according to the back of my bill they exist!) I was told by the CSM that she did not know who that was or where I might be able to find one. So… I gave up… for the evening.

BUT… I have not gone away! I want my money back! This charge is unfair and disgraceful. I also want an apology from the BT big chiefs for the way the managers treated me. I was just asking a simple question at the beginning of the call …. but you have lost a friend for the remainder of my life!!

And.. I suspect I have not been the only one who has witnessed this disreputable side of BT’s customer relations. My revenge will be swift and final…. there must be other providers out there who treat customers as customers and not prisoners.

Anybody like to share their experiences of companies that are better than BT?

Son finds job-share drinkers to join dad at pub

I have pointed out this Reuter’s story to all my children…. for obvious reasons!

“Found: drinking companions to join elderly gentleman for a friendly beer at his local pub.

Mike Hammond was bombarded with offers after advertising in his village post office for someone to accompany his 88-year-old father Jack on visits to a southern England pub from a nursing home.

He offered the lucky winner 7 pounds an hour plus expenses and, after sifting through the applicants, decided on a job-share. Drinking duties are to be divided between a retired doctor and a former military man.

“Dad’s now going to be going down to the pub several times a week — three with his new friends and twice with me,” Mike Hammond told The Times on Thursday. “I want to give him some of his old life back.”

And should anyone want to help out with the expenses I’m sure the weans would be happy to accept the help! 

What a brilliant idea! Well done that lad!

Ness Woods, Derry, Northern Ireland

Peaceful…. eh?

Diamond Dan

Congratulations to the Orange Order. You have made my day. I….. never….never ever thought that anyone could come up with..

Diamond Dan… the Orangeman -

Thank you….. made my day!

Now when the Ancient Order of Hibernians adopt the Jolly Green Giant..

Whem…… given that Diamond Dan is environmentally friendly and loves recycling etc… which one will be the greenest?

The first green orangeman has been born!

A Nuclear N. Ireland?

Ever considered having a Nuclear Power Plant sitting on the horizon?

How about five?

Well it is five nuclear power plants that are being proposed for N.Ireland. Sounds ridiculous considering how, for years, the people of N.Ireland have had to face the threat of Sellafield in Cumbria. However, despite this, some of our Stormont MLAs have been saying, “Yes,” to Nuclear Power.

They say Nuclear Power is the only way to tackle the future energy solution to fossil fuels and they say it is the only way to tackle global warming. What is most concerning about this support of Nuclear power is not the support itself but the ignorance of their research and information.

Here are Ten Reasons to Say No to Nuclear which these MLAs have seemingly ignored.

1. The waste disposal problem has never been resolved by the nuclear industry. No one has resolved the challenge of long-term storage of nuclear waste.

2. Nuclear is not safe. Fifty years after Windscale (Sellafield) and twenty years after Chernobyl, scientists cannot guarantee against human or operational error and the risk of catastrophic consequences, along with the secretive culture of the nuclear industry. This is a compelling argument for rejecting the nuclear option.

3. The cost of providing back-up-power for nuclear is prohibitive.

4. Renewable sources can provide all of our necessary power. Our untapped wind resources are equivalent to many times the total output of our power suppliers. There is no need to revisit nuclear power, which imposes unacceptable risks.

5. Nuclear power will not solve climate change. A doubling in global nuclear power by 2050 would only lead to a 5 percent reduction in global greenhouse gas emissions. This is less than one tenth of the reductions scientists say we require.

6. Energy efficiency provides a better economic and environmental return. Research has shown that investment in end use efficiency programmes can deliver up to ten times the gains in comparison to money spent on nuclear.

7. Nuclear will not heat our homes nor power our cars. As oil runs out we may have to power our cars by hydrogen or by electric battery power. Both these forms of stored energy are generated from electricity. It makes more sense to use intermittent wind power rather than nuclear power to provide them.

8. Nuclear power leads to nuclear weapons. The nuclear cycle in the US and the UK has been inseparable from nuclear proliferation. This is one of the most dangerous and morally unacceptable dimensions of the nuclear
argument. Do we want our children to face wars where nuclear weaponry is the norm?

9. A centralised and subsidized state solution versus tens of thousands of green jobs. At the moment more energy is wasted in our centralised electricity transmission and generation system than is used heating every house and apartment in the country. These losses come from waste heat sent up power station chimneys and in power used up in transmission power lines. Nuclear power would only further reinforce this wasteful centralised system.

10. Uranium is a depleting resource. Uranium is not a renewable or endless resource. A major investment in nuclear could leave us facing depleted uranium resources by the middle of this century. Thus to indorse nuclear power is not solving the problem for future generations. We are instead distracting from implementing the real solution in the form of clean, green, sustainable energy.

Number Ten is the most obvious reason to Say No to Nuclear, in my opinion. People who propose Nuclear Energy seem to think it is a sustainable energy resource, which is farthest from the truth. Uranium that is used to power Nuclear Power stations will run out ….. just like fossil fuels. On the other hand, our untapped wind resources, north and south of the border, are equivalent to many times the total output of our current power suppliers and of course will not run out.

We could lead the way in Europe simply because of our geographical location. We should be following the example of Scotland where they have ruled out nuclear and are fast becoming the most successful wind energy country in Europe.

The five sites being proposed for Nuclear Power stations are:

• Magilligan Point
• Torr Head
• Islandmagee
• St. Johns Point
• Cranfield Point

All very beautiful sites! Do you live near any of these? Do you know anyone that lives near them? If you do get in contact with them and let them know about these proposals. Time and time again decisions go ahead with no input from the local populance who would be directly effected. Make sure the word is spread and people are made aware.

Beautiful: Shroove, County Donegal, St Patrick’s Day

The old weather has been a bit strange of late, hasn’t it? One minute we’re being frozen like fish fingers at a processing plant, the next we’re having our heads blown off by angry gales and the next minute everything calms right down and all is lovely and spring like. It’s Irish weather I suppose!

On St Patrick’s Day I took a wee wander around Donegal and found my self at Shroove. The pictures say it all…. I defy anyone to have found a nicer place to spend a wee hour… but if you did.. point me to the pictures!

In teh meantime .. enjoy these.

1. A ship passes Shroove on the way into Lough Foyle.

2.The rocks to the Lighthouse are an irresistible climbing frame for children.

3. The rocks always attract a hopeful fisherman!

4. And what better way to spend an afternoon!

Time to Talk: Peacelines:Bishop Street/Fountain, Derry

I’ve been watching these “Peacelines” for too many years to remember and my heart goes out to those who have to live there. The pictures here show such a peaceful scene in the early October sunshine that you could be mistaken for thinking that life along the line can’t be really all that bad.

Bishop Street, Derry: Catholic side on right: October 2007

A little bit of sunshine, cars parked everywhere, people walking about their daily business .. surely it must be a nice spot to live? If it was really dangerous sure no-one would be foolish enough to park their expensive cars there … would they?

But I know from personal experience that, even at peaceful times, the odd bottle flies the wall - in both directions. My car has the dent to prove it! So life must be pretty hard for those on the line who are never sure when the next missile will arrive. It must be the constant drip of dread that wears people down. Given that experience ….it’s a wonder that both sides of the line are populated with really friendly people!

The Fountain, Londonderry: The Protestant Side: October 2007

So what is it really like to life with high fences to protect you? What goes through your mind when the weans go out to play? How does anyone cope with the strain of knowing that the fences can never be high enough to stop determined stone, bottle and bomb throwers? What do those who live with these fences really feel? After nearly 40 years of metal sheeting and wire fences do they really feel any safer now that the Peace Process is so long lasting?

The Peaceline: Bishop Street, Derry, October 2007

Do local people ever see a time when they will feel safe enough to ask for the barriers to be removed or will these wire symbols of our divisions become a permanent feature of our environments?

Call Centre Conversations

This list of call centre conversations is doing the rounds. Would the individuals responsible for these gems please own up?

Even better… if you have any other examples please feel free to add them!!

Customer: ‘I’ve been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can’t get
through to enquires, can you help?’.
Operator: ‘Where did you get that number from, sir?’.
Customer: ‘It was on the door to the Travel Centre’.
Operator: ‘Sir, they are our opening hours’.

Samsung Electronics
Caller: ‘Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?’
Operator: ‘I’m sorry, sir, I don’t understand who you are talking
about’.
Caller: ‘On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly
states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall
socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give
me the number for Jack?’
Operator: ‘I think it means the telephone point on the wall’.

RAC Motoring Services
Caller: ‘Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me
when I am travelling in Australia ?’
Operator: ‘ Doesn’t the product name give you a clue?’

Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France )
‘If I register my car in France , do I have to change the steering
wheel to the other side of the car?’

Directory Enquiries
Caller: ‘I’d like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff please’.
Operator: ‘I’m sorry, there’s no listing. Is the spelling correct?’
Caller: ‘Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the
‘B’ fell off’.

Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company
in Woven.
Operator: ‘Woven? Are you sure?’
Caller: ‘Yes. That’s what it says on the label;
Woven in Scotland ‘.

On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds
from a phone box told a worried operator:
‘I haven’t got a pen, so I’m steaming up the window to write
the number on’.

Tech Support: ‘I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop’.
Customer: ‘OK’.
Tech Support: ‘Did you get a pop-up menu?’.
Customer: ‘No’.
Tech Support: ‘OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?’
Customer: ‘No’.
Tech Support: ‘OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up
until this point?’.
Customer: ‘Sure. You told me to write ‘click’ and I wrote
‘click”.

Tech Support: ‘OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen,
can you see the ‘OK’ button displayed?’
Customer: ‘Wow. How can you see my screen from there?’

Caller: ‘I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realized that I need it.
If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back
again?’.

There’s always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things
in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not
fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which
was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care
department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired;
however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization
for ‘Termination without Cause’.

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
(Now I know why they record these conversations!):

Operator: ‘Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?’
Caller: ‘Yes, well, I’m having trouble with WordPerfect.’
Operator: ‘What sort of trouble??’
Caller: ‘Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden
the
words went away.’
Operator: ‘Went away?’
Caller: ‘They disappeared.’
Operator: ‘Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?’
Caller: ‘Nothing.’
Operator: ‘Nothing??’
Caller: ‘It’s blank; it won’t accept anything when I type.’
Operator: ‘Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??’
Caller: ‘How do I tell?’
Operator: ‘Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??’
Caller: ‘What’s a sea-prompt?’
Operator: ‘Never mind, can you move your cursor around the
screen?’
Caller: ‘There isn’t any cursor: I told you, it won’t accept
anything I type.’
Operator: ‘Does your monitor have a power indicator??’
Caller: ‘What’s a monitor?’
Operator: ‘It’s the thing with the screen on it that looks like a
TV.
Does it have a little light that tells you when it’s on??’
Caller: ‘I don’t know.’
Operator: ‘Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??’
Caller: ‘Yes, I think so.’
Operator: ‘Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it’s
plugged into the wall.
Caller: ‘Yes, it is.’
Operator: ‘When you were behind the monitor, did you notice
that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??’
Caller: ‘No.’
Operator: ‘Well, there are. I need you to look back there again
and find the other cable.’
Caller: ‘Okay, here it is.’
Operator: ‘Follow it for me, and tell me if it’s plugged securely
into the back of your computer.’
Caller: ‘I can’t reach.’
Operator: ‘Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??’
Caller: ‘No.’
Operator: ‘Even if you maybe put your knee on something and
lean way over??’
Caller: ‘Oh, it’s not because I don’t have the right angle -
it’s because it’s dark.’
Operator: ‘Dark??’
Caller: ‘Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I
have
is coming in from the window.’
Operator: ‘Well, turn on the office light then.’
Caller: ‘I can’t.’
Operator: ‘No? Why not??’
Caller: ‘Because there’s a power failure.’
Operator: ‘A power……………………………….. A power
failure?
Aha, Okay, we’ve got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your
computer came in??’
Caller: ‘Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.’
Operator: ‘Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and
pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the
store you bought it from.’
Caller: ‘Really? Is it that bad?’
Operator: ‘Yes, I’m afraid it is.’
Caller: ‘Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell
them??’
Operator: ‘Tell them you’re too f*%king stupid to own a
computer!!!!!’

Chuckle Brothers to Knuckle Boys

Well… so …there ye have it. Big Ian has decided that it is time to go, although, there is a great deal of speculation around that he was really pushed. But does that really matter anyway? He’s gone and that is teh point.

What is interesting is the strange bedfellows the reaction to his political life and his resignation have revealed! Who’s have thought that ordinary people interviewed on the Falls Road would have a kind word to say for him or that those interviewed on the Shankill Road would his treachery of them as they reason they are glad he’s going. Ok… so the words on the Falls weren’t that warm…. but it finding someone to give Paisley a glass of water on the Falls over the last 40 years would have been nigh on impossible! So the fact that a reporter found someone to say something nice about him was pretty astounding! And who’d have thought that members of his own church would be elated at his decision?

Of course Ian’s departure is going to leave a void and one that there will be an unseemly scramble to fill. And most ordinary folk will be looking at the end of the Chuckle Brothers and wondering if we’re about to see the era of the Knuckle Boys. ‘Cos the favourite to grab the leading DUP chair is none other than the eternal deputy Peter Robinson MP.

Now.. given Peter’s huffy schoolboyish manner and Martin’s practicised unflapability we could be in for some right fireworks between the two! I don’t predict we’ll see many smiles. And given Peter’s contention that power sharing doesn’t really have much of a future we could be in for a pretty rocky time over the next few months.

So… here’s the question - now that the initial shockwave has passed and we’d had a chance to think about what the future might hold without Big Ian’s hand on the wringer - what do you think?

Will the new boy be able to hold everything together for the DUP?

National Trust Staff Get Day off!

I am amazed at the daftness of some organisations and then I remember that sometimes it’s just best to smile and enjoy the craic!

One such instance concerns the news that the National Trust are to give their 170 NI staff the 29th Feb as an extra day off. But… it being a Leap Year and all they have decided that staff must jump through some hoops!! As reported by the BBC in this story - NI trust workers get ‘green’ day - the workers get the day off but:-

In a campaign called “Leap forward for the climate”, the charity wants its workers to use 29 February to help reduce their carbon footprint.

It is also urging its 260 volunteers in Northern Ireland to take the day off and try to lead greener lives.

Now… I’m all for a wee extra day off and I applaud the NT’s effort in going for green… I even like the notion that they are encouraging their staff to reduce their carbon footprint…. BUT there is a line and they have crossed it BIGTIME. And that line is…here:-

Staff will be asked to report back to managers detailing how they have changed to a greener lifestyle on their day off.

Now……I have a small suggestion for the staff..ok? On Monday, when the boss asks you to report on how you reduced your carbon footprint just say you decided to kept your foot in bed all day! Snuggled under your blanket you’ll have used less energy that these mangers used in sending the notice of this to all staff!

This absolutely reeks of management nose-poking-into-private-lives of the highest order. It’s time the NT realised that their job is to look after National Treasures not interfere in employees’ private lives.

So…in case some employees don’t really want to say it… I’ll say it for them, “Butt out, Boss!”

Oh… if you want to see how really silly this organisation can be then reading the last part of the BBC story will tell you all you need to know. And I quote:-

However, all National Trust properties in Northern Ireland will remain open on 29 February, so staff are also being urged to take the time off later in the year if they have unavoidable work commitments.

I can hear staff moaning and eyes rolling from here…….

With such fuzzy management thinking its little wonder that the places this organisation looks after are falling down!