Best Literary Description of the Hell that is Air Travel!

January 19, 2009

How do you enjoy air travel? Not a lot.. if you are anything like me! I want to get where I’m going but I really don’t like the way I have to get there. The over-crowding, the searches, the endless waiting, the poor food, the strange habits of fellow passengers…etc etc.

Fyling Tin Tubes

Flying Tin Tubes

Now there is so much wrong with air travel and I feel too linguistically inadequate to express the full horror of modern day air travel. So.. to-day… I am launching a search for the Best Literary Description of the Hell that is Air Travel!

Please feel free to add your suggestions.. or indeed pen your own descriptions.  🙂

And the first nomination is…. Thomas Harris for this great piece from HANNIBAL:-

“Back in steerage where the package tours go, the fifty-two members of the Old World Fantasy, a tour of eleven countries in seventeen days, are returning to Detroit and Windsor, Canada.Shoulder room is twenty inches. Hip room between armrests in twenty inches. This is two inches more space than a slave had on the Middle Passage.

The passangers are being slopped with freezing-cold sandwiches of slippery meat and processed cheese food, and are rebreathing the farts and exhalations of others in economically reprocessed air, a variation on the ditch-liquor principle established by cattle and pig merchants in the 1950s.

Dr Hannibal Lecter is in the center of the middle row in steerage with children on both sides of him and a woman holding an infant at the end of the row. After so many years in cells and restraints Dr Lecter does not like to be confined. A computer game in the lap of a small boy beside him beeps incessantly.”
HANNIBAL by Thomas Harris: Arrow Books, Chapter 48

So.. what’s your favourite description of the hell that is modern flying? Please feel free to post your nominations… or.. just pen a wee paragraph yourself?

I look forward to everyone’s entries… your flights of fancy!! 🙂


Travel? -We gotta get outa here!

June 15, 2007

With the massive disappointment, stemming from the brilliant weather last week and the change to our normal coldish, wetish June, I’ve been getting friends asking me how best to use the internet to get out of Northern Ireland for a week’s break! So I said I’d post a few sites and that maybe readers might post their favourites as well!

goldengate3.jpgSo here goes – but remember that the best deals may already be gone and that you must read the terms and conditions on these sites very carefully.

That said, you can still grab a bargain if you keep looking!
First port of call is to plump for a straight flight to anywhere sunny and the budget airlines are where you start.

Try:- Read the rest of this entry »

Aer Lingus Belfast bound?

June 12, 2007

According to this great story appearing on the BBC to-day, Airline could land 1,000 new jobs , Aer Lingus is considering basing its UK operations in Belfast. The Lagan Valley MP Jeffrey Donaldson maintained this would be a substantial investment boost for Northern Ireland and is quoted as saying:-

“Aer Lingus is a respected carrier with its eye on growth opportunities in the United Kingdom; meanwhile the International Airport is growing its business at an impressive rate.”

Now I welcome the 1000 jobs Read the rest of this entry »